negativeone | ( au post ) i become location and you veer towards me.

[Frank’s got the better aim, but Matt’s got the speed and agility of his father, maybe even more, and they’re both on the floor safe from the RPG, M40 clutched tight to Frank’s chest against him as he breathes rough and rugged. There’s still bullets being rained down on them, really, despite the rpg and all, and Frank forces himself to get back into position and start shooting, again, careful to remain out of the crosshairs of any other potential sniper. There’s a lot of them.

Matt’s inquire earns his gaze, his quick scrutiny too, and his eyes go wide, scrambling to find something, anything on him to close Matt’s eyes. He ends up tearing off a piece of his own undershirt, wiping futilely at the chemicals around Matt’s eyes and he’s pulling him up and away from the line of fire, bodily, away from the chemicals.]

Close your eyes, close your eyes! [As a direct contrast to his statement, he’s pouring the rest of his canteen into his eyes, the rest of his good water, hand shaking a little, for once. He’s barely finished when he almost screams himself, bullet piercing through the armor of his shoulder, angry and anguished, and he has to leave Matt be to continue his job, swearing loud under his breath. He can’t feel anything in his shoulder but he keeps up shooting anyway, careful not to waste one bullet.

He repeats, like a mantra.] One batch, two batch, penny and dime...

[ Through the haze that's slowly clearing around his head he can hear Frank's rifle going again. He needs---he needs to get up. He needs to watch his back. He's got to do it.

The rubble he's landed on shifts when the other man hits it, and he groans. He must have fractured a couple of ribs despite the armor when he landed. He's still trying to parse together questions that he's not getting answers to from his friend when his eyes start burning like he decided to put his face into a lit flare. It causes him to shout, and he twists his face away from Frank's hands when he tries to wipe at it. ] It burns!

[ Christ, he's been shot before but it didn't hurt this bad. He's fucking useless as his buddy is dragging him up and away from whatever the hell is in the canisters. There's water then, but the cold of it does nothing to stop the angry fire that washed out everything except Frank before it all ended up as nothing. He's panicking, breathing ragged and he hears a hoarse shout from Frank before he's pulling away. Panic almost takes over completely then before there's the familiar sound of the other man's voice, followed by each shot of the rifle.

He knows that rhyme. He knows it cause he's spent nights at the Castle house when he'd been too drunk to walk home on his own, and they'd been on leave. Nights when he listened to Frank's little girl beg for that story, night after night. Hell, even some nights here on Skype when he gets the chance to read it to her. ]

Edited (apparently sleepy and html are not friends) 2017-10-02 05:57 (UTC)

[He’s screaming, now, at Matt, at the heavy bleeding in his shoulder weeping through his gear and all, at the gunfire around them. Every shot is deadly precise, every one, and it feels like it’s happening in another world, as if he’s someone else just living in this body watching things happen. He shoots, shoots. ]

Keep your fucking eyes shut, Matty!

[The order is a bark, more vicious than intended, but he’s got a lot going on. Everything’s spinning, and Matt’s hurt and he’s hurt too, even if he can ignore it. He’s running dangerously low when everything goes quieter, quieter then quiet, and Frank waits for anything else, panting savagely as he quickly moves to check all the corners of the little room. He thinks he’s got them all. He thinks.

He quickly runs to Matt’s side, cups his face and begins wiping at him again, futilely, bandana over his own mouth. He’s breathing hard, wet, bleeding hard too but he doesn’t give a shit about the bullet in his shoulder or the blood, only cares about Matt.] Can you see me, Matt? Relax, relax, I got you, medichopper coming soon. Keep your eyes shut.

[ Matt shifts after Frank has to put him down, trying to ignore the burning in his eyes that feels like fire arcing along every single nerve, and uses the feeling of the rock against his cheek to tuck down hopefully out of sight. All he hears is enemy fire cracking against their position and it slowly fizzling out as Castle takes them out one at a time.

He grits his teeth at another wave of pain, feeling like he's going to be sick, and tries to swallow back growing panic. He can't see. Oh god, he can't---there's a heavier weight next to him after it all goes quiet, and when hands find his shoulders he tenses, almost lashing out. Almost only because he hears Frank's voice, and his own is shaking when he whispers hoarsely: ] I can't see. I can't see you, Frank.

[ Fear bubbles up and he grabs at the other man's arms, gloves twisting in his uniform, and he wants to scream. He doesn't, only because there might be more of them out there. More of them just waiting for them to reveal their position again, and get a good shot. ] I can't see!

Matty, shh, you gotta keep it down.

[Frank’s whispering, hands all over Matt’s face, the burns and the marks around his eyes. He’s not even looking at him, just looking toward him, when his eyes do open. He pours some of Matt’s water in his eyes, a cap full of it really, and he pushes the rest toward his mouth to make him drink it.

Shit. Shit shit shit.] Keep your eyes closed!

[ Matt's trying, he really is, and he bites his bottom lip, choking off the next words that threatened to tumble out. It ends up earning pained whimpers before he gasps at the feeling of water being poured over his eyes, bearing away some of the pain momentarily and earning a sigh of relief that sounds more like a sob.

He keeps his eyes closed, and grips at Castle's arm to ground himself. When he feels the canteen against his lips he takes a drink, breath shuddering out with his tamped down panic. ]

I got you, I got you, Matty.

[His own voice is muffled, sawdust and phlegm and debris in his chest and throat, bandanna over his mouth, as he takes a swig of the canteen too, much smaller than Matt's. He doesn't know when they're coming, and he feels like the world is ending all around them.

It's not the first time, but it hurts the worst because it's Matt. His arms spread wide, taking Matt into them and careful to avoid contact with the chemicals on his skin, his eyes covered by the bandanna. He holds Matt like he held Lisa when she broke her leg, Frankie when he skinned his knee off the monkey bars that one time and wouldn't stop fucking wailing about it, and it's different but it feels the same, he feels like he can do this.]

Stay with me and keep your eyes closed.

[ Frank's voice sounds like it's getting further away. It can't be cause he knows that he's laying against him, half in his arms and half against his chest. His gloved fingers don't leave where they are tightly curled in the other man's sleeve, but it's getting harder for him to focus on everything around them.

He's trying to do what he's told. Focus. Keep his eyes closed. His face burns and his head hurts and his ears are clogged, everything still sounding a touch too far away. He's no good for Castle like this. He can't do his job if he has to keep his eyes closed. He can't do anything about that though, and that scares him more. ]

M'here. [ He says it, whispered and half-mumbled. He doesn't even realize that he's as close as he is to passing out until he does. ]

[They're rescued like that, Matt in some kind of state between sleep and being awake and Frank holding onto him so tight he could probably hurt him if he tried any harder. Frank's separated from Matt to get his shoulder looked at, a general inspection, and they're almost at base when Frank's decidedly all done with that and finds himself at Matt's side.

The ocular nerve's been burned out. They'll be able to confirm more at the actual infirmary at base, but Matt's blind. He's blind. It's whispered to Frank, who just says Fucking Christ before he sits next to Matt's cot and reaches for his hand.

They're separated for a good while at the infirmary, Frank doing the debriefing as Matt's worked on, and it's only hours later that Frank can see him properly, ambling in with a cane and a sling over his shoulder and a brace for his neck. A mess. Yet, he still manages to bring some grub for Matt.

He sits beside him, dressed in fresh fatigues and clean shaved. Briefly, he considers offering to feed him, but doesn't, won't unless the kid asks, won't handle him with baby gloves.]

... How are you feeling, Red?

[ Matt doesn't remember a lot of the helo ride back to base. He remembers less as he's taken away from Frank, muddled voices, scents, sounds---

When he wakes up the first time (Frank's not there) and everything is so loud. It's too much and everything hurts, from his face, eyes, and head to the scratch of the wool blanket against his skin. He panics, between the voices of the doctors and all the rest, enough that they have to give him a mild sedative just to calm him down.

He's not sure how, but he knows Frank is coming before he gets in. He can smell his aftershave (something Lisa gave him), and the starch from his fatigues. His head raises too fast, bandages around his eyes scratching uncomfortably, and groans a little at the too quick movement. ]

Frank? [ He licks at his lips, starting to chap a bit, and lets his head drop back towards the pillow, shifting uncomfortably. ] Everything's loud, I---You---heh, you brought something from the Mess?

[ The meds haven't worn off entirely, yet, and it's hard for him to verbalize just how loud the rest of their world is currently. It's painful, but it just seems to be him. Only him that it's happening to. ] Hey, you ok?

Easy there, don't bust any stitches now.

[ He helps himself to plop down in the chair beside the bed, digging a fairly greasy burger out of the brown bag in his hand with a fruit to pair it off and a juice. He arranges all of it on the tray he drags from overhead, watches diligently. ] Hell yeah, I did. God knows what they're feeding you in here.

[ Frank frowns. ] I actually came to see how you were feeling, moron.

Okay, sure.

[ Matt turns his face, he can hear the crinkling of the bag so clearly, the grease from the wrapper, the juice he can't place, and an ---] Green apple and a burger too?

[ Another wince as he shifts. I'm better, I think. They gave me a sedative a little after I first woke up.

[Frank's brow raises and he almost nods, thinks better of it.] Yeah, yeah. I did. Got you one of those fake smoothies too, thought you'd like it.

[He takes a seat, finally, after preparing Matt's food for him, unsure how he'd take anymore help.] Listen, Murdock. I'm gonna be honest here. They're trying to keep everything that happened hush, presumably 'cause they fucked up. I think there's more to the story, but they shrugged me off when I tried to ask further.

Thanks. [ He waits, listening to him unwrap and set everything out. After a minute or two, he reaches out for the smoothie drink first, opening it to take a sniff first, and then a sip.

He listens as he drinks, brow furrowing a little bit. ] I heard. It's---there was a lot of whispering here. I couldn't catch all of it cause ---well, I didn't exactly stay calm when I woke up.

Did you catch anything off? [Well, that's sure as hell got his attention. Frank tries not to seem as startled as he is by the incident.] I'm uh, I am sorry about your eyes, Murdock. I tried my best to clean them, stop what was happening but I couldn't.

They seemed worried. Their heartbeats were so fast.

[ He shifts and sets the drink on the tray, and reaches out to find his hand, grasping at the air. He shakes his head, more by reflex than anything. ] I know. Hey, Frank? There wasn't anything you could do.

I know you tried.

Heartbeats? Murdock, what meds did they put you on?

[ Quietly, Frank reaches to take the grasping hand in his own. ] Still, wish it didn't have to be like this.

No, Castle. I heard them.

[ He sighs, but squeezes the other man's hand. It sounds crazy, it must. ]

Can't do anything now. I--I'll be okay. You're the one that has to deal with the new guy soon, right? Gonna ship me back.

Right, Murdock. Drink your juice.

[A frown tugs at his brow, and he shrugs, hand still holding Matt's.] I think I got one more tour in me. Just one more. Then I think I'm done, Red.

[ He pulls his hand away, squeezing Frank's again as he goes to find the juice again, opening it and taking a sip. ]

Home with Maria and the kids then? Doing chores and fixing up the place?

Yeah. Hell, I ought to take her place. The kids will love it.

[He laughs a little.] You gonna get any kind of help when you get back? I know you got your old man and all.

That'd be something to see. I'll have to come by and harass you.

[ He grins a bit, but it fades a little too fast. ] I don't know. They're talking about the VA hospital to help me acclimate to this---I just---I'm not sure what to do, man.

Yeah, yeah. Seriously, man, you know Maria would have you over anytime, Lisa and Frankie love you too. I just... I'm tired, man. I want my wife, my kids.

[An exhale escapes, nose pinched between thumb and forefinger.] Hey, that's a good place to start. I can ask David, see if he knows anywhere to start.

I know. I wouldn't mind dropping in.

[ He hears the heavy sigh, and his chest tightens a little in response. ] Yeah, that'd be good. I think it'll just be nice to be home again.

Yeah. Yeah, I think so. You wanna go home, Red?

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject